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Hey Dummy, I’ve Been Eating Eggs Entirely Wrong This Whole Time!

Updated: August 1, 2020 By: Patrick

rollie-eggmaster-2015

If you’re like me and have been waiting a lifetime to eat eggs like a popsicle, well, wait no longer! Introducing the “Rollie Eggmaster.”  Now, thanks to the magic of science, you can vertically cook your eggs and eat ’em like a kabob…just like it speaks of in the Bible!

Apparently cooking eggs in a pan, you know, like a cave person is just too much these days.  Simply cracks some eggs into this contraption and within minutes you have a tube of eggs (on a stick, mind you) slowly pop up like elderly toast so that you can eat on the go.  Let me rephrase that.  So you can eat on the go?  And look how happy this little minx is eating her eggpsicle:

For real she can barely let it get past her lips.  She’s probably like, “Mommy, I need an adult!”

And bonus points for the marketing suggestion that you should be cooking this at your desk in work!?!?!  If someone made eggs next to me in work I would quit. Life.  I would quit life.

rollie-vertical-eggs-office

Suggested marketing slogan:

Rollie Eggmaster:  Because Your Eggs Should Go Out the Same Way They Look Going In

rollie-eggmaster-gross-reviews-2015

 

Filed Under: guide Editorially Created

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