I’ve Found My Wife. Kris Jenner Has Filed for Divorce.

Breaking News:  TMZ is reporting that Kris Kardashian has officially filed for divorce from (Spruce) Bruce Jenner.  I don’t need to worry about how Kris will support me because apparently there was no prenup, but the silver lining (playbook) is that since they’ve legally separated in June 2014 anything she made after that is 100% hers/mine. Other details include:

  • No one get spousal support
  • They’ll share joint custody of Schecky Kylie Jenner (she’s 17)
  • They’ve already agreed to a property split
  • Bruce gets to keep his current face

No word yet who gets to keep Kris’ clothes.  You see, that was a layup joke about Bruce since, you know, he may or may not allegedly be in transition.

Image via Instagram
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